It has been a stressful week for us....if you don't feel like reading, just know that it was good news. The new med for Roger did succeed in stopping the anxiety/panic attacks. And the CT scan was done this past Monday.
We both had appointments with dermatologists on Wednesday. They are at the same place but with different doctors. I stressed about how that was going to work out, since Roger does not have much short term memory. But they are so kind and so good, she staggered them till I could be in the room with him. He really isn't having much breaking out now. Every now and then a little patch will pop up....but nothing terrible. So, she told me how to use his meds...when he originally got them, I was not with him. He could not remember how they were supposed to be used.
Then it was my turn. I have had three spots of basal cell cancer on my face, so I get worried about things that don't heal. I had a spot come, and it has been getting bigger...but keep in mind that it started as not much more than the head of straight pin, and grew to about a quarter of an inch. And every time I washed my face, there would be a fresh bloody little scab come.
Well, she looked at it and gave it a name, said she didn't think she needed to do a biopsy because it wasn't cancer, and froze it off plus a couple or three other places. I was so relieved, and thankful I could have cried. I had not told Roger I was worried, but with putting sunscreen on my face, I have to look at my face every day...and I just wish I could avoid it.
We then seen our nurse practitioner Friday and got the news about the scan--nothing had changed, no new bleeds nothing going on there. So that was a relief. So thankful for answered prayers.
I don't get the fearful feelings quite like I used to...this one friend of Roger's always told me the Good Lord was not done with Roger yet...he seemed to have no doubt that Roger would make it through.
Then I get to thinking about when I had him to the ER in February, the nurse that had him that day, had been there when he had the brain bleed. And he told us that Somebody was on our side, because the helicopter had been in the area doing some training and they did not have to wait on it to get here. So the Lord has been good to us...
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A year ago Roger had a TIA(mini-stroke)...on our anniversary. Technically that was yesterday. He had the stroke August 2nd. I try not to dwell on it....but oh, what a time that was. I am so thankful to still have time with him. When he was in the hospital I stayed some nights with my brother and then in his room; in rehab I would come home at night...I would often cry most of the way home...I would cry because it was a beautiful sunset, or beautiful sky and he couldn't be there to see it with me. I wondered would we ever get to go on another drive together. I wondered would I ever feel his arms around me....would he ever come to himself.
And he has....somethings are really slow coming, but little things keep improving. At first he didn't have much interest in TV, then, he started watching it but couldn't quite use the remote....now he has it figured out and can turn the TV on and off, and find what he wants. He still doesn't do much on the computer, but he does get on Youtube and find videos to watch while he rides the stationary bike. So things keep improving...
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I heard these guys, Future Islands, on Austin City Limits tonight...they have a decidedly different sound. And two or three of their songs really sound alike. I almost changed channels but for some reason, I didn't. I really like this song...the words to it are below the video.
"Ran"
Ingest, where it goes, nobody sees but me
So perfect and so sweet
But the rest, feels incomplete
Like the rabbit's foot I keep
In the locket, with no key
And I can't take it, I can't take this world without
This world without you
I can't take it, I can't take it on my own
On my own
On these roads
Out of love, so it goes
How it feels when we fall, when we fold
How we lose control, on these roads
How it sings as it goes
Flight of field, driving snow
Knows the cold
Ran round the wailing world
And what's a song without you?
When every song I write is about you
When I can't hold myself without you
And I can't change the day I found you
On these roads
Out of love, so it goes
How it feels when we fall, when we fold
How we lose control, on these roads
How it sings as it goes
Flight of field, driving snow
Knows the cold
Out of love, so it goes
How it feels when we fall, when we fold
How we lose control, on these roads
How it sings as it goes
Flight of field, driving snow
Knows the cold
Ran round the wailing world
So perfect and so sweet
But the rest, feels incomplete
Like the rabbit's foot I keep
In the locket, with no key
And I can't take it, I can't take this world without
This world without you
I can't take it, I can't take it on my own
On my own
On these roads
Out of love, so it goes
How it feels when we fall, when we fold
How we lose control, on these roads
How it sings as it goes
Flight of field, driving snow
Knows the cold
Ran round the wailing world
And what's a song without you?
When every song I write is about you
When I can't hold myself without you
And I can't change the day I found you
On these roads
Out of love, so it goes
How it feels when we fall, when we fold
How we lose control, on these roads
How it sings as it goes
Flight of field, driving snow
Knows the cold
Out of love, so it goes
How it feels when we fall, when we fold
How we lose control, on these roads
How it sings as it goes
Flight of field, driving snow
Knows the cold
Ran round the wailing world
